The first attack ad was against Godwin the Warthog. It featured a testimonial from Darius, captain of the school weightlifting team. "I'm real strong and all I ever eat is grass and all I ever chew is cud," he intoned ominously.
"Now Godwin wants to outlaw vegetarian food and make it so I can only eat meat. It's like he WANTS Townville to win the next competition! Well, I got a message for you, Godwin. Why don't you eat ME?"
The commercial ended with a disclaimer warning the student body not to attempt to eat Darius. The message was funded and approved by "Friends of Splendiferous".